Mainland Signage Issues

 

Beijing has gone to outrageous lengths to prepare for the 2008 Olympics, entirely rebuilding whole sections of the city and submitting residents to dust and racket above and beyond the dust and racket they normally endure.  The government has also focused on straightening out some of the confusing and incorrect English signs one runs into everywhere.  Of which consider the following--a classic collection.

 

E.M.

Taipei

 

P.S. Yes, we see these kinds of things in Taiwan too, but usually not quite in the same league. 

 

 

 

 

A couple notches up from just lovely.

 

 

 

But taste like cat.

 

 

 

Here, cripple, take my seat.

 

 

 

Come with flied lice.

 

 

 

A separate entrance for hos.  Why didn't I think of that?

 

 

 

Sounds better than canned water, doesn't it?

 

 

 

Sorry, over there please.

 

 

 

Good to know.

 

 

 

Not nice.  Some of my best friends are liquor heads.

 

 

 

Don't think you can trust those ingredients lists on the labels.

 

 

 

Tastier than the grown-up variety.

 

 

 

It would be once you start chewing it.

 

 

 

 

Starbucks should be very afraid.

 

 

 

Don't tickle this one.

 

 

 

Weird, because horsebeans sound so delicious.

 

 

 

Get something for that aunt of yours.

 

 

 

I knew it!

 

 

 

They should open a branch here.

 

 

 

No, don't need any help with that.

 

 

 

Don't expect much sleep on this flight.

 

 

 

Should be on most of the hotels in town.

 

 

 

How much would I have to give you to braise the dork that brought me here?

 

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I did hesitate to post this, because, frankly, if we Westerners had to present our products to the world using Chinese, we'd make the same kinds of howlers, actually probably worse.  Besides, before another couple decades pass more of us will probably have to do just that: translate labels and menus for the Chinese tourist/consumer or risk irrelevance.

 

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