"George W. Bush has deep ties to the American political unconscious.  He gets such strong support because he knows what people really want from a leader.  He responds to the heart."  --Sarah Cunningham, Bush Campaign Volunteer

 

 

*****

 

 

WANTED: A Leader

 

 

Give me liberty or give me a leader.

 

And not just a gutless brakes-for-small-animals wussy leader.

 

Not some wimpy Euro-style leader.

 

No, I want a macho backslapping birdflipping leader.

 

A leader to stand in for me.

 

 

Give me liberty or give me a leader.

 

And not some UN appeaser leader.

 

Not some smart-talking international lawyer leader.

 

I want a bastard that eats the third world for breakfast and Germany for lunch.

 

A leader with teeth like the casings used to shell unruly villages.

 

A leader willing to jack up the unequal distribution of wealth.

 

A leader that never offers small growers the fair price.

 

That loves dangerous chemicals and refuses to stop their spillage.

 

A leader to stand in for me.

 

 

Give me liberty or give me a leader.

 

I want an arrogant decisive leader.

 

A leader not afraid to ignore treaties, modify Constitutions, or travel by condom inside the belly of a Colombian housewife.

 

A leader who burns up three tankers of crude per hour.

 

Whose golf cart gets four miles to the gallon.

 

A leader who plows under Afghan poppy fields with his left hand while cashing in on the traffick with his right.

 

A leader who rails against abortion but doesn't mind a few schoolgirls gunned down by Israeli thugs.

 

A leader who can tell it like it is with a string of baldfaced lies.

 

A leader to stand in for me.

 

 

Give me liberty or give me a leader.

 

And don't show me some Nam vet on welfare hard luck leader.

 

I want a robust ballbusting moving-forward leader.

 

A contra-loving neocon heehawing leader.

 

A leader ready to kick the Pope, doctor the books, and cash in the whole future for a quarter of good earnings.

 

A leader not afraid to cheat or tell the academics where to get off.

 

A leader ready to grab what he can from our fast dying planet.

 

A real leader, not a negotiator or intellectual.

 

Don't give me a bilingual fucking leader! 

 

I want a leader with grammar like a gas station attendant.

 

A leader ready to choke that bitch Mother Nature like she deserves. 

 

A leader guaranteed to rot my bladder and destroy my soul.

 

A leader to end all leaders.

 

A leader to stand in for me.

 

 

Eric Mader

Taipei, 10/31/04

 

Poached from the poem "Caffeine" by

Wallace Gagne

Tokyo, 07/10/04

 

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